Another state took the plunge into denying equal rights for
all its citizens. There are now 31 states where my marriage is OK but others' aren't. Saddening. Maddening. Unexpected? Not by a long shot. If Americans have been culturally consistent
about anything since its inception some 250 years ago, it’s been oppressing
someone. Anyone whose throat we can stand on we do. If we weren't enslaving
people we were making damn sure that they weren't our equals. In point of fact,
despite the proclamation in our most holy of documents that all men are created
equal, equality is a very recent revelation for most. Slavery may have ended 150 years ago but, it’s
been less than 50 years since civil equality became a rational way of thinking.
Hell, we kept our mothers, sisters and daughters out of the voting booth until
just 99 years ago. For a country founded on the idea each and every citizen is
entitled to the opportunity to live his/her life as he/she chooses, we've done
an awful job backing up that idea with action.
There has, at no point in the history of the United States, been a
period where at least one group wasn't fighting for equality.
“Fighting for equality”. What a ridiculous statement. Think
about what equality means. It’s the simplest of ideas. One set of rules for
everyone. That's it. It couldn't be an easier thing to give. It takes hard work
to create inequity. It takes lobbying and vitriol and money and time and
unbelievable amounts of effort to stare a group of people down and say,
"You know all those rules we have in place already? Well, we made a whole
different set for you." But, that's who we are. If we aren't crushing the
hopes and dreams of some section of our society then we aren't "real"
Americans.
I just want to address some of the issues and call some
people out on their bullshit if you'll indulge me for a paragraph or
three. It's just entirely too
frustrating to shut up about anymore. I
honestly wish I were clever enough to create simple meme and be done with it
but I'm a rambler so, ramble I must.
Gay Marriage
Let’s just get this out of the way. There is no such thing
as gay marriage. The LGBT community isn't fighting for some special exception
to the rules. They're fighting to be treated exactly like everyone else.
Marriage is marriage. One human loving another and vowing to be together
forever.
Sanctity
Really? This is still an argument? If you've ever honestly
tried to use this argument and were able to keep a straight face then you're a
disgusting hypocrite. The only way to
genuinely make this an argument at all is to punish those who have disgraced
the institution in any way. By taking away
a right from a specific group you essentially make that right a privilege. To
preserve the sanctity of that privilege you must take it away from EVERYONE who
doesn't "respect" it. That means all you cheaters lose the privilege.
That means all you divorcees lose the privilege. That means that everyone that
has a marriage that doesn't live up to the standards we set as a society must
lose the privilege. Standing on your soap box with your third wife while your
mistress brings you coffee is off the table permanently. Will that ever happen? No. Of course not. Therefore sanctity is an
opinion, and apparently a pretty elastic one.
Laws don't change minds
They sure as hell don't. But that isn't the point of
laws. They exist to protect us from
ourselves. They exist to protect me from you and vice versa. Racism, misogyny and homophobia will likely
always exist. And, while that may be a bit depressing, there is little we can
do about the families that raise their children to hate those who are
different. We can, however, keep those types of people from being validated
through legislature. You are absolutely entitled to your opinion as an
American. In fact, you can go out on a street corner and scream your opinion
through a bullhorn while holding up a giant sign that cleverly sums up that
opinion. Unfortunately for you, and for me in many, many cases, our opinions
mean next to nothing when it comes to the law. If you aren't putting anyone in
danger then the law should not be telling you what to do. Bigotry will always
exist and, in some ways, will always be protected (1st amendment). But,
shouldn't we learn from our past mistakes and realize that bigotry should never
be legislated? We've tried this before. With African Americans, with Asian Americans,
with women. It doesn't work out. The righteous win in the end. If you need to
think about it pragmatically, lets at least save ourselves some time and money.
Religion forbids
Yeah, it forbids you to cast judgment. It's no secret that
most of the money donated to the "fight for the nuclear family" is
coming from Christians. Be they evangelical or Mormon, the followers of Christ
have latched onto this issue and are refusing to let go. Only problem is that
they aren't very Christ like. As I said before, you are entitled to your
opinion. You are entitled to read a passage in the old testament forbidding
homosexuality and to allow that to inform how you feel about homosexuals
(coincidentally, the previous passages proclaiming similar punishments for
eating shellfish and pork are all but ignored by mainstream Christians, imagine
picket lines in front of Red Lobster citing Leviticus 11:4-43). You are
entitled to feel hatred toward whomever you want. However, it is not your place
to judge them. You are not God and only God can judge. God doesn't need your
help. Your job is to live your life as you believe your God wants you to. It is
not to punish your fellow man. Judge not lest ye be judged. I'll never understand why that isn't the easiest
rule to follow.
And that's all. It is a sad set of circumstances we find
ourselves in but, I find solace in the notion that future generations are
always more intelligent and compassionate then their forefathers. 10, 20, 50
years from now, our children and grandchildren will look back on our generation
the same way we look back those in the pre-civil rights era. They'll be
embarrassed for us. They'll wonder why there was so much hate in our hearts.
They'll wonder how their parents and grandparents could let such a thing
happen. It’s unfortunate that this is way it works in our country. It’s
pathetic that it takes hindsight to find compassion for human beings whose only
crime was being born. Our offspring will have to fix our mistakes. They'll do
what we're seemingly incapable of doing. They'll do what's right.
